The Church of the Undefeated Season

I would like to call to order the 3rd (Or is it 4th?) Annual Conference of the Church of the Undefeated Season, the only true and living football church* on the face of the planet! We welcome long-time members, and new converts.



All who are in favor, please manifest by the appropriate sign.



We will begin our program this week with a testimony meeting, and will conclude when Bronco Mendenhall hoists the crystal trophy above his head in the Superdome in January.



I know the Church of the Undefeated Season is true!

- I know that no team is going to run our defense, heat, humidity, and SEC affiliation notwithstanding.

- I know that Rice doesn't give anybody enough experience to face major competition after gutting your coaching staff and having shaky options at QB.

- I know that of the few things greater than the change in elevation between UCF and Provo, the most significant will be BYU's margin of victory.

- I know that if your school's name ends with "State" and you have BYU on the schedule, you should bet that the spread will be covered. Also, take the over. :evil:

- I know that there's a special place in Church of the Undefeated Season Hell for Gary Patterson, especially since the OC he had possessed earlier has been excommunicated.

- I know that, whether you call yourself the Pac-10 or the Pac-12, Bronco still owns you.

- I know that any man who can ride a wave, a Harley, and a wild horse will know exactly what to do in Hawaii.

- And I know that Norm Chow is WAY past his prime; that Jordan Wynn throws just like he looks - like a little girl; that Pendleton, Van Noy, Kaveinga, and The Ansah will visit the the :utard: backfield with utter destruction if they do not repent (they won't); and that good will triumph over evil - by at least two touchdowns.



In the name of Jimmer, amen.



*until we lose a game, that is - but come on, that never happens!

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Reading that post was like watching "Married with Children". So inapropriate on so many levels....yet hillarious. :lol:

Amen.



- I know with every fiber of my being the world is a better place when seen through blue-colored lenses.

- I know without a shadow of doubt our offense will be more napoleon than vanilla this season and we won't run the ball every time we line up in the i formation.

- I know as sure as the sun shines that Doman will have Heaps take a knee when heading into the half and up by two touchdowns.

- I know defense wins championships and that's what we're going to have this season.

I know it is true. I was converted in Dec. 1980 at Jack Murphy stadium in San Diego. I saw a miracle and will believe ever more.

-I know that there will be doubters (talking to you Belotti and Luginbill, etc), and it will be sweet to silence the ignorant false priests who claim to have the answers.

Gunk wrote:
Amen.



- I know without a shadow of doubt our offense will be more napoleon than vanilla this season and we won't run the ball every time we line up in the i formation.

Uh....our offense is going to be really short and have huge egos? Or did you mean "neapolitan"? :)

Y 4 Ever wrote:

Amen.



- I know without a shadow of doubt our offense will be more napoleon than vanilla this season and we won't run the ball every time we line up in the i formation.

Uh....our offense is going to be really short and have huge egos? Or did you mean "neapolitan"? :)

Haha! Yes, that's what I meant. Gotta love auto complete smart phones.

Every member a missionary. I have been preaching the Church of the Undefeated Season, but the gentiles here in Oregon are not receptive.

As a true believer, I am a witness, and solemnly testify with boldness, that cutteth the stiff-necked and hard hearted and unwilling to listen to the heart, that our defense believes in the laying on of hands, with authority, and administering justice, with true intent, and that the truth (Ansah) will set us free, and should the very jaws of hell gape open wide, it will be for our experience, and we will emerge victorious as a beacon of light that has been set upon a hill for all to see.



Can I get an AMEN?!!!!



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Can I get a "there can only be one!" ???

BlueIsBetter wrote:
Can I get a "there can only be one!" ???

No, but you can get a "There can be only one!" ;)

One Y, one faith, one victory, one believer at a time.



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Yea verily we will Heap Td's upon our foes in great numbers.



Yea verily we will come to pass (and pass very effectively).

Should the PER for and PER against be some sort of doctrine or ritual?

Most definitely, PER for and against should be doctrinal.



I hereby renounce all ties to all football churches the CUS! You may count me among your membership.

I dunno, guys. I want to join, but I think a higher power is trying to speak to me via Google Ads.



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Dcr36 wrote:
I dunno, guys. I want to join, but I think a higher power is trying to speak to me via Google Ads.



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If you login there are no ads!

I replied my testimony earlier in the day on another thread but will repeat it here as it is more appropriate on this thread.

I know the CUS is true and believe in Hawk, Sno, Spiff and Kiwi as General Authorities on moderating this site.

I also know Cougar Corner to be true as far as it is translated correctly. :crazy:

Sunday's lesson will be on Enduring Until the End in honor of the stifflingheat in Mississippi.