Archived Topic

This Just In!

by BoiseBYU · 11/2/2010

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BoiseBYU
1. UK and France announce new military cooperation agreements. It is broad in scope involving nuclear deterrent, aircraft carrier usage and equipment development. Indeed, it even covers surrender protocals, which the French volunteered to undertake, they having the expertise in that area and all

2. Minnesota Vikings give New England a third round draft pick for the right to fire Randy Moss. Vikings need to go back to what they do best--like pillaging villages.

3. Republicans set to regain the House. Financially distressed homeowners express envy.

4. BP makes $1.8 billion profit last quarter. Same can't be said for the shrimpers, fishers, hoteliers, etc etc etc

5. Giants win World Series and thus ends another season of baseball. Doctors treating sleep deprived patients saddened. It is so easy to just tell a patient to turn on a baseball game and let it put the patient to sleep. Works so much better than many medications.
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frdbtr
Sources in the Pharmacy industry reporting that Big Pharmacy was rooting for the Giants and expect and upswing in sales.
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ABYUFAN
ABYUFAN has voted today and was somewhat surprised not to have been accosted by Michelle Obama at the polling place. :whistle:
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BoiseBYU
Forgot one:



Homeowners upset with robo-foreclosure signings

Citizens upset with robo-election calls

This Just In can handle those--it is the offense's robo-play calling that has got me all up in arms!
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BYULV
BoiseBYU wrote:
Forgot one:



Homeowners upset with robo-foreclosure signings

Citizens upset with robo-election calls

This Just In can handle those--it is the offense's robo-play calling that has got me all up in arms!


This also explains all the robo-posting we have seen here lately. No matter the topic, it takes just a few milliseconds for a robo-poster to cut and paste an anti-heaps rant to the thread.



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Mars
BoiseBYU wrote:
Homeowners upset with robo-foreclosure signings. Citizens upset with robo-election calls. This Just In can handle those--it is the offense's robo-play calling that has got me all up in arms!
This also explains all the robo-posting we have seen here lately. No matter the topic, it takes just a few milliseconds for a robo-poster to cut and paste an anti-heaps rant to the thread.

Of course the blame can't go to the lifeless robo-receivers... ;)
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SenorCougar
New enhanced photos of the grassy knoll in Dallas indicate that something is in there. Further investigation shows it to be a truck driven into a ditch by former President Bush. Obama is on his way to drive it off the cliff.......
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Mars


This just in, BYU has announced that Andrew Rich is wearing special padding this season designed uniquely for him alone.



Deeply shocked and troubled by this news, SDSU boosters are already drafting a letter to BYU asking that they forfeit their win over the Aztecs because of it.
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BYULV
Mars wrote:


This just in, BYU has announced that Andrew Rich is wearing special padding this season designed uniquely for him alone.



Deeply shocked and troubled by this news, SDSU boosters are already drafting a letter to BYU asking that they forfeit their win over the Aztecs because of it.


Robo-safety!



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BYULV
Harry Reid wins reelection in Nevada. Amidst rumors Reid's cousin may have been working the booth for CNN's election night coverage, SDSU boosters write a letter demanding Reid forfeit the win.



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SenorCougar
BYULV wrote:
Harry Reid wins reelection in Nevada.



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Nevadans are happy with 14+% unemployment. Reelect Reid for 6 more years........
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BYULV
SenorCougar wrote:
Harry Reid wins reelection in Nevada.



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Nevadans are happy with 14+% unemployment. Reelect Reid for 6 more years........


Yes, but according to Reid, if it weren't for him we would be in a worldwide depression. Unfortunately, this race just goes to show what money, power and influence (as well as selling your soul) will get you these days. This guy had no business winning reelection. It was like watching byu play against TCU, only when the horn blows at the end of the game the score reads BYU - 45, TCU- 15. (I would gladly swap these two scenarios)



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