This Just In--College Football Arrives!

Chilean miners still in a deep hole; sort of like Ole Miss Coach Nutt, after his team's loss to J State



More people today believe that President Obama is a Muslim; this correlates with more people believing that Utah and Colorado's going to the Pac 10 strengthened that conference



Florida minister to burn the Quran; he'd do a bigger service if he burned Kansas' play book



Duke coach says Va Tech outplayed BSU; never has someone in so few words showed so much stupidity



China wants to host the 2026 World Cup; the explanation is that the currently horrendus traffic jam between Bejing and Outer Mongolia should have cleared up by then

Ole Miss drops one space in polls to number 12 just behind Vanderbilt. When asked why the top 12 teams are all SEC teams one pollster admitted, "well, they are the strongest conference and deserve it since they have to play each other".

Question arise about Utes durability after Wynn hurts throwing hand in first game. Apparently BCS schools get injuries too.



BYU vitriol on Utefans.net is at an all time low following the two school's departure from the MWC. Unfortunately, new posters, old posters, and overall traffic is also at an all-time low.

When asked why they are not posting on their team's messageboards, UTE posters replied that they are not really U fans (who would be), but more "BYU haters," and are too busy spewing venom on BYU sites.

BoiseBYU wrote:



More people today believe that President Obama is a Muslim; this correlates with more people believing that Utah and Colorado's going to the Pac 10 strengthened that conference

So you're saying Utah and CU going to the Pac 10 strengthened it? :skeptic:

Italics wrote:

More people today believe that President Obama is a Muslim; this correlates with more people believing that Utah and Colorado's going to the Pac 10 strengthened that conference

So you're saying Utah and CU going to the Pac 10 strengthened it? :skeptic:

:skeptic:

This just in is delighted to learn that Sampson will be shoring up the defense next year in a recruiting spectacle. Unfortunately, BYU denied admittance to his long-time girlfriend, Delilah.

CougarClaw wrote:
This just in is delighted to learn that Sampson will be shoring up the defense next year in a recruiting spectacle. Unfortunately, BYU denied admittance to his long-time girlfriend, Delilah.

Will he be asked to shore off his locks ala Juice? If so, I don't think he'll be nearly as effective.

Schmoe wrote:

This just in is delighted to learn that Sampson will be shoring up the defense next year in a recruiting spectacle. Unfortunately, BYU denied admittance to his long-time girlfriend, Delilah.

Will he be asked to shore off his locks ala Juice? If so, I don't think he'll be nearly as effective.

Might make a difference alright. :bug: Maybe we can petition the compliance office for a varience. ;)

bigbluepuma wrote:

CougarClaw wrote:
This just in is delighted to learn that Sampson will be shoring up the defense next year in a recruiting spectacle. Unfortunately, BYU denied admittance to his long-time girlfriend, Delilah.

Will he be asked to shore off his locks ala Juice? If so, I don't think he'll be nearly as effective.

Might make a difference alright. :bug: Maybe we can petition the compliance office for a varience. ;)

We need to get him on the cast of the theater department's production of "Hair."

CougarClaw wrote:
This just in is delighted to learn that Sampson will be shoring up the defense next year in a recruiting spectacle. Unfortunately, BYU denied admittance to his long-time girlfriend, Delilah.

In related news, BYU announced that pillars supporting the stands at Lavell Edwards Stadium will be reinforced during the offseason.

Florwood wrote:

This just in is delighted to learn that Sampson will be shoring up the defense next year in a recruiting spectacle. Unfortunately, BYU denied admittance to his long-time girlfriend, Delilah.

In related news, BYU announced that pillars supporting the stands at Lavell Edwards Stadium will be reinforced during the offseason.

Classic!! :lol: :lol:

Florwood wrote:

This just in is delighted to learn that Sampson will be shoring up the defense next year in a recruiting spectacle. Unfortunately, BYU denied admittance to his long-time girlfriend, Delilah.

In related news, BYU announced that pillars supporting the stands at Lavell Edwards Stadium will be reinforced during the offseason.

In further developments, defensive coordinator Jaime Hill talked to reporters about a new defensive formation involving just Sampson and "the jawbone of an ass." When pressed about whether it would work, Hill said, "We know it will work; we're just concerned about the body count."



The University of Utah's Kyle Whittingham could not be reached for comment, as he was recovering from jaw surgery.

redneckjedi wrote:

CougarClaw wrote:
This just in is delighted to learn that Sampson will be shoring up the defense next year in a recruiting spectacle. Unfortunately, BYU denied admittance to his long-time girlfriend, Delilah.

In related news, BYU announced that pillars supporting the stands at Lavell Edwards Stadium will be reinforced during the offseason.

In further developments, defensive coordinator Jaime Hill talked to reporters about a new defensive formation involving just Sampson and "the jawbone of an ass." When pressed about whether it would work, Hill said, "We know it will work; we're just concerned about the body count."



The University of Utah's Kyle Whittingham could not be reached for comment, as he was recovering from jaw surgery.

Dude I just lost my diet coke through my nostrils...Well done sir well done!

Florwood wrote:

This just in is delighted to learn that Sampson will be shoring up the defense next year in a recruiting spectacle. Unfortunately, BYU denied admittance to his long-time girlfriend, Delilah.

In related news, BYU announced that pillars supporting the stands at Lavell Edwards Stadium will be reinforced during the offseason.

Florwood scores!

In a rushed attempt to "counter" BYU's good recruiting news, Coach Whit announced that Utah will be adding to their roster the most feisty safety that the west coast has ever seen. Said Coach Whittingham, "He's like a pissed Marshall Henderson, but with testicles."

Italics wrote:
In a rushed attempt to "counter" BYU's good recruiting news, Coach Whit announced that Utah will be adding to their roster the most feisty safety that the west coast has ever seen. Said Coach Whittingham, "He's like a pissed Marshall Henderson, but with testicles."

So I guess Whit has ended that whole "we're sackless" thing huh? :crazy:

The BYU training staff has called in a podiatrist for consultation, as it is feared that he may die of fallen arches.

redneckjedi wrote:

CougarClaw wrote:
This just in is delighted to learn that Sampson will be shoring up the defense next year in a recruiting spectacle. Unfortunately, BYU denied admittance to his long-time girlfriend, Delilah.

In related news, BYU announced that pillars supporting the stands at Lavell Edwards Stadium will be reinforced during the offseason.

In further developments, defensive coordinator Jaime Hill talked to reporters about a new defensive formation involving just Sampson and "the jawbone of an ass." When pressed about whether it would work, Hill said, "We know it will work; we're just concerned about the body count."



The University of Utah's Kyle Whittingham could not be reached for comment, as he was recovering from jaw surgery.

LOL!!!! Five out of five. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: