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This Just In--July 24 edition

by BoiseBYU · 7/25/2010

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BoiseBYU
So much material! Time to reboot!



Glen Beck apologizes for calling Brian Urlacher a "neo nazi" He refuses to back down, though, from calling Keanu Reeves "Neo"



Speaking of Urlacher, when told of Beck's apology, he replied "The schwein!"



Dick Cheney gets medical treatment for his heart. Liberals are devastated. All this time they were sure he had no heart....



Wall Street pay czar says he's done enough to Wall Street fat cats and their gargantuan bonuses. He said he shamed them pretty well. Maybe it is This Just In, but I don't think you can shame dudes who are shameless!



A-Roid closing in on 600 HRs. This Just In salutes A-Roid's HRPSI metric; it is quite high. For those who don't follow baseball too closely, HRPSI is a new baseball statistic that tracks Home Runs Per Steroid Injection.



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Brayden Green
This just in, Graham watson fired from ESPN, because apparently people actually care about Non AQ schools now.
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Alphaleonis
Barack Obama announces his new plan to solve the illegal immigration problem: "I will CHANGE the U.S. into a Third World nation - - - No one will want to get in!!"
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Mars


This just in- the NCAA reminds college football players that they cannot attend parties where agents pay their expenses. The SEC tells them that it's fine if they steal a TV and punch a co-ed in the face while they're there though, they can still tecnically play after that.
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