This Just In--BYU Fan Edition

BYU fans protest in Philadelphia another loss by George Washington. "All this guy has in his play book is the retreat option. When's he going to open things up? Probably freeze to death at Valley Forge."



BYU fans send open letter to Congress demanding that Lincoln appoint a new offensive coordinator. "We should have won at Bull Run and all we kept doing was running up the middle. We never went over the top. And now all we see are losses and defeats. The buck stops with Lincoln. Why won't he see reason and appoint someone new?



BYU fans blast Brigham Young over allowing US troops into Utah. "We all knew they were coming. We all knew where they were coming. And we could not stop them. If he can't get a better defense together, he won't have any legacy to speak of like a school being named after him.

BYU fans criticize Joseph Smith's QB selection, reasoning that any thinking coach would have known that John C Bennett was only operating at 65% spiritual capacity.

Maybe I'm misremembering my history, but didn't Washington and the troops actually freeze at Valley Forge and didn't Lincoln actually appoint someone new?



Nevertheless, good stuff.

SpiffCoug wrote:
Maybe I'm misremembering my history, but didn't Washington and the troops actually freeze at Valley Forge and didn't Lincoln actually appoint someone new?



Nevertheless, good stuff.

Literalist! 8)

Florwood wrote:
BYU fans criticize Joseph Smith's QB selection, reasoning that any thinking coach would have known that John C Bennett was only operating at 65% spiritual capacity.

Very good! And what's up with Benedict Arnold transferring? Washington is letting prized recruits out of his grasp!

BoiseBYU wrote:

BYU fans criticize Joseph Smith's QB selection, reasoning that any thinking coach would have known that John C Bennett was only operating at 65% spiritual capacity.

Very good! And what's up with Benedict Arnold transferring? Washington is letting prized recruits out of his grasp!

Amen. Unacceptable. He completely mismanaged him. He gave him an entire army command, early in his career and then he wasted his talents in Canada! Canada!

BoiseBYU wrote:

BYU fans criticize Joseph Smith's QB selection, reasoning that any thinking coach would have known that John C Bennett was only operating at 65% spiritual capacity.

Very good! And what's up with Benedict Arnold transferring? Washington is letting prized recruits out of his grasp!

Boise very good this one made me L O Freakin L!! :lol:

I love this thread.

Hmmm. Next we will hear that BoiseBYU wrote this on his drum.

Lincoln needs to stop talking about the tradition of what happened four score and seven years ago, and start replicating it. He is resting on his laurals too much. That one win in Gettysburg won't win the war. The Union only won Gettysburg because it was fought on home turf. Lincoln's troops need to get a big win in the Confederate's territory.

And what is taking Sherman so LONG to get to Savannah?! You don't have to stop to burn EVERY hamlet on the way! Just get to where you're going already.

Y12 wrote:
Lincoln needs to stop talking about the tradition of what happened four score and seven years ago, and start replicating it. He is resting on his laurals too much. That one win in Gettysburg won't win the war. The Union only won Gettysburg because it was fought on home turf. Lincoln's troops need to get a big win in the Confederate's territory.

Oh man I just blew diet coke (now acceptable i might add) out my nose! My sides are hurting.

SpiffCoug wrote:
And what is taking Sherman so LONG to get to Savannah?! You don't have to stop to burn EVERY hamlet on the way! Just get to where you're going already.

And Grant! The man is so stubborn he keeps trying the same stinkin play! Doesn't he know the Rebs are waiting for it?!?

And Washington can't beat a quality opponent without trick plays--except for that one victory at Yorktown which he won in the 4th quarter.

I can't believe Lincoln! Why couldn't he seal the deal and get Robert E. Lee to join the Union?! But no, he let Lee go to the Confederates! How are we going to compete if all our best recruits - from our own prep school, no less - sign with another team!

SpiffCoug wrote:
I can't believe Lincoln! Why couldn't he seal the deal and get Robert E. Lee to join the Union?! But no, he let Lee go to the Confederates! How are we going to compete if all our best recruits - from our own prep school, no less - sign with another team!

Living in Virginia now, this is awesome!

Good thing we've got George Custer. So much grit and determination, you know he'll never back down from a fight! Just what we and the men who follow him need!

Best thread ever.

SpiffCoug wrote:
I can't believe Lincoln! Why couldn't he seal the deal and get Robert E. Lee to join the Union?! But no, he let Lee go to the Confederates! How are we going to compete if all our best recruits - from our own prep school, no less - sign with another team!

Don't worry, I hear Lincoln plans to meet with Lee in Appomatax, VA after his mission in the South and get him to join the Union then.

And Eisenhower going for it....he should have let his defense win it