This Just In - Noah Hartsock's Nose Version

Noah Hartsock is one of BYU's great players. He also has an enormous shnoz. One prevailing theory on why he's shooting better than 60% from the field is that it acts as a lazer guided sight. Just point. and shoot.



Noah Hartsock also manages to get fouled quite a bit. Given the disproportionate mass on his face, his nose unfortunately takes most of the beating. Current Vegas odds on whether Noah will have to leave any upcoming game with yet another bloody nose is better than 50%.



Noah Hartsock's nose is so big when he goes to the movie theater he sits next to everyone.



Noah Hartsock's nose is so big, its mass is measured in acres.



This Just in has learned that the previous two items are not in fact news items and will be moved to the "Yo Mama jokes" thread instead.



Noah Hartsock's nose also distracts a majority of ESPN announcers into saying his name incorrectly. Thus, Noah Heart-STOCK rears his ugly head with regularity -- Kind of like a "pocket Kraken".



FInally, This Just In is trying to confirm whether or not Noah's nose was in fact touched by the Jimmer to give him uncanny scoring abilities and quickness. Either way. We're glad he has a nose for victory.

Every other game Noah seems to have a cotton ball stuffed up his nose.



There may be a correlation between the size of his nose and the amount of damage it sustains. I, however, believe there is a direct correlation between how hard he plays and beating his nose takes.



:P

Confirmed!

Coach Rose wrote:


"I don't really know what kind of comment to make about his nose. It has been relocated or dislocated or broke so many times. But he got it hit again. They had to put it back together again. But he will be back. He's a tough kid,"

Great analysis on the nose job. Here I thought he just had a nose for the ball :-)

Used to be a little button nose. Unfortunately, it has been beat on so much that it is permandently swollen to that size and shape. ;)